WW2: ‘Ello Mayday!

Following the sensational debut of my first webisode, here’s another instalment in which I mumble through a story about a cockney cab company employee who can’t understand a word that I mumble (it’s really all his fault though).
Hey, the cats are cute at least!

I’ll be back next week (hopefully) with some written wordz.
xWG
I hate it when people can’t understand you…
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The worst! ….. not that I can understand what anyone else is saying either though….
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That doesn’t help either. You got by ok I assume?
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Ohhh conversing with this man is a daily struggle that shall never be gotten by! 🙂
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You do it daily? Will you ever get used to it? lol
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HA! I’m picturing some old guy, perhaps someone at the cab company’s grandpa, and they just let him stay on to make him feel useful, but every time he answers the phone they were like “We told you not to answer the phone!” and so he said “Rightie, I’ll just go take one of the cabs out for a spin”…and then ensuing mayhem of old person driving…which is why they’ve just gone back to letting him answer the phones.
And a big ‘Ello!!! to One and Edward (who are the true stars of this blog, right?).
This does remind me of the first time I visited England and toured a private manor house. I asked the guy working there if it was alright if I took photos. “What?!” (very posh, not cockney). So I restated my question very slowly and clearly. “What!?” So then I donned my best posh Brit while asking the EXACT same question. “Oh yes, quite alright, go right ahead.” So, work on that Cockney accent and some day you too will break through Cab Man’s deafness.
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I mean…… that is almost 100% how I have pictured this man/what I think must be true. He has GOT to be someone’s father/grandfather who they’ve situated at the phones to give him some renewed sense of purpose… but they’ve told him to just pass along any important phone calls to actual members of staff. My latest tactic is:
‘Ello Mayday!’
‘Hi, I’m ringing from THE COUNCIL!’
And after I threateningly shout ‘COUNCIL’ a couple of times, he just goes ahead and transfers me to an authority figure.
Hahaha your England story is MY LIFE!!!! I have had to entirely reprogram the way I say many words out of a survival instinct to not be mocked or ignored. Do I say ‘duty’ with a liquid ‘u’ and a ‘t’ instead of ‘doody’? You betcha! Do I say ‘lahmb’ instead of ‘laymmm’ after a whole table of customers laughed at me for asking who ordered the lamb roast? Absolutely! Eventually I’ll have one of those fake Madonna accents or maybe just sound like Eliza Doolittle.
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Madonna Doolittle…that’s your stage name from now on. Own it!
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Your story remind me of riding in the backs of taxi cabs in Canada, and trying to make out the dispatchers’ directions that would play on the super staticky radio. I could never understand what was said, but the drivers seemed to be able to. I’m wondering what would happen if you delivered the cab order instructions in the best cockney accent you could muster? And maybe added a bunch of background static? I think that might work. Your captions made me laugh. Jane and Edward are adorbs. 🙂
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Hahaha I am always intrigued/impressed by that in cabs too! I think you’re right–going full-on My Fair Lady might be the key to his heart/ears. Fortunately, I am extremelyyyyyy good at accents (this is a lie) and was thinking of showing some of them off in a future vlog post. Haha glad you enjoyed and thanks for watching! Jane and Edward are the true stars, obviously 🙂
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Oooopsie! I must have missed this post last week… But I did already catch the video! Hahaha! Like some of the other people up there ☝ I thought that putting on your best cock-er-ny accent might fix the problem… But that would take the fun out of the whole experience, wouldn’t it? 😝 At least Jane and Edward understand you though! 😻😻
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Haha yes, and I wouldn’t want to rob my colleagues of the pleasure of laughing at me whilst I’m yelling down the phone at Ole ‘Ello. I’d say Jane & Edward’s understanding of me is selective. They tend to be totally deaf to the words ‘no’ and ‘bad cat’ … but they’re much cuter (I’m assuming) than my buddy down at Mayday! Haha thanks for watching! 🙂
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Hahaha! I think a fitting end to this story would be for you to stop into the Mayday office one day, to discover that Ole ‘Ello is in fact a prime specimen of manhood in his late twenties… 😆 Hey, we can dream, can’t we? But yes, selective hearing or no, Jane and Edward are probably waaaaay cuter! 😸
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‘Ohhhh hello, Leo circa 1996 Romeo + Juliet! What are you doing in this–‘
‘Ello….. MAYDAY!’
*everything I thought I knew shatters*
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Oh no. That wasn’t a good ending at all! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!
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Well, you still remarkably managed to conjure 1996 Leo! Omg I had to make an ‘urgent’ call to ‘Ello Mayday this afternoon for an ’emergency’ taxi to 3 different destinations…. it went so badly. I think I probably waved goodbye to that social worker forever when she got in that cab.
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Oh no! And calling another emergency cab to follow her rapidly-cooling trail and make sure she’s ok would surely only compound the problem further! 😵
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Awesome graphics.
Also, “speaking Slytherin”?? C’mon, get your HP straight. I assume you meant Parseltongue. 😉
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Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*********tttttt nice save! Gah, I’m so far out of the Potter game these days, it’s embarrassing. I also don’t know anything about celebrities anymore and exclusively wear over-sized sweatshirts out of the house. What is left of teenage Ali?
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